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Mistakes Downton Abbey Did Not Make

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Downton Abbey's photo snafu has been quite the buzz on social media. If you haven't seen it, there is a plastic water bottle in the background of one of the promo pictures. The social buzz got me thinking about all the stuff the show has gotten right. I love so many things about the show: the costumes, the upstairs /downstairs relations and the portrayal of Americans. But one aspect I find most interesting is the role women played in that time period. On the show, they have leadership positions in the home and strong opinions. Violet Crawley, played by Dame Maggie, is probably my favorite character. Her words of wisdom are outstanding.

Here are a few quotes / words of wisdom from Dame Maggie that are great advice, regardless of the time period.

"I am a woman. I can be as contrary as I choose."

The takeaway: disagree. And speak up about it. Diversity of opinion is one of the most successful aspects of any management team. I find, as a woman, I frequently think about things differently than my male colleagues. Voicing those opinions has helped me bring value to the companies I have worked for.

"Don't be a defeatist, dear, it is very middle class."

My experience is that women sometimes are their own worst enemies. We are harder on ourselves than anyone around us. If you think you can't do it, you probably can't. Believe in yourself. You will succeed.

"Life is a game, where the player must appear ridiculous."

Don't be afraid to look like an idiot. Try something new. Go out on a limb. I read a statistic somewhere that public speaking is the number one fear in women. More than death. Or snakes! My father forced his daughters to enter speech competitions as kids. Now, I am so glad. My advice to women: conquer your fear of public speaking. Take a speech class. Don't be afraid to stand up in front of a crowd and make a fool of yourself -- it is a very valuable skill.

While I don't suggest taking life lessons from television, I will make an exception for Dowager Violet. I find it inspiring to find a female character that is strong, outspoken, and a force to be reckoned with. Especially from a time when women had almost no legal rights. Bravo Downton Abbey creators and writers. I will overlook a misplaced water bottle for more great life lessons from Dame Maggie.

7 Reasons 'Rectify' Is My Favorite Underrated Show

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It wasn't until I had blown through all of Breaking Bad, Louie, True Detective and Mad Men that I knew I needed help. How many times could I watch Aziz Ansari's standup specials or re-watch John Mulaney's New In Town and laugh at the same jokes all over again?

I needed something new. And after a friend recommended three lesser-known shows to watch, I found that only one -- Rectify -- was streaming on Netflix. So that was that.

Rectify is like the moody art-school sister of True Detective, the elegant, lyrical aunt of The Killing; the perfect combination of drama, suspense, doubt and dysfunction.

Here's the backstory: Daniel Holden (played by the impressive Aden Young) was convicted of raping and killing his high school girlfriend 19 years ago. He even confessed. But after spending nearly two decades on death row, Holden is released when new DNA evidence does not tie him to the murder.

He has never seen a cell phone or a laptop and isn't familiar with the new members of his now blended family. He moves home with his mother and stepfather, but many skeptics in the small Georgia town are outraged that a killer has been freed. It is a media frenzy. This is where episode one begins.

The show was originally developed at AMC but Sundance later swooped in -- and it doesn't look like they're sorry. Yesterday Sundance announced that the show will be renewed for a third season, and since no one I've talked to even knows what it is, I'm going to list 7 reasons why Rectify is my favorite underrated show on TV:

1. The fact that we don't know whether Daniel did it or not.
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Sure, he confessed. But as the series builds, suspicions about other guys there on the night of the murder come into play, as well as suggestions that the police might have coerced Daniel into a confession. The possibility of drugs having been involved also adds to our questioning of what happened that night. But on the other hand, Holden is a real weird guy. He insists that he's a bad person on more than one occasion and we don't know if his weirdness can totally be pinned to the fact that he's been alone on death row for the last 19 years.

2. The cinematography.
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Rectify is stunning. Every shot. The camera dances with a blade of grass or the breeze blowing through someone's hair. We notice the laugh lines on an exhausted face or the way dust moves through a parking lot. The moodiness of Rectify is one of its strongest features and the brilliant cinematography stands out from the very first moment. It might be a testament to the show's beauty that I actually watch the opening credits every single time. The LA Times called it "television as prose poem."

3. The complexities of family.
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Since Daniel was put away, his father died and his mother remarried. A stepbrother and eventually his wife became part of the family. His mother and her new husband also had a son, so Daniel comes home to a teenaged half-brother, as well. The family has expanded since he left and moving back into his childhood home with new people in it is jarring. Daniel's mother is a wonderful mosaic of pain, confusion, joy and fear. Her son is finally home but no one exactly knows how to act.

Daniel's stepbrother Teddy is terrifying in his unpredictability and I do not take my eyes off of him when he's on screen. He could break down or attack at any moment. But the love in the family is deeply noted as eight family members try to gently sew back together a fabric that is thin and frayed. You can't help but root for each of them.

4. Abigail Spencer.
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Abigail Spencer, who plays Daniel Holden's angsty, stubborn and powerfully loving sister Amantha, is the one who fought hardest for her brother's freedom. She is the glue. You might recognize her from her arc on Mad Men or from the upcoming star-stuffed This Is Where I Leave You. In fact, she has five films in post-production and is filming another. Her talent for subtlety is most aptly displayed in the short film she made with real-life boyfriend Josh Pence about a couple bitterly breaking up. Neither of them speaks a word of dialogue.

But Spencer most impressively plays the role of what could be a clichéd loving sister on Rectify with layers of neuroses, insecurity and even anger. If Daniel Holden is the firefly, his sister Amantha is the light.

5. The constant sense of danger.
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Even though Daniel has been released from prison for now, he is by no means exonerated. The lawyer who made his career on putting him away is running for office and does not want to see Daniel free for even a day longer. The family of the murdered girl wants justice. As Daniel tries to function in a world he's missed out on for 19 years, many people in the town want to see him dead. Every street corner and knock on the door is infused with danger and dread. He is never safe but he also never seems to fully understand that.

6. The South.
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Much like True Detective, the southern setting of Rectify stands out as a character all on its own. Shot in Griffin, Georgia, the show relies on the sprawling fields and open pastures, the drama of the big shady trees and the isolation of the open roads. Atlanta is not far away, but this story is steeped in the smallness of the town and its secrets; in all the prejudgments and the stories that have been whispered down from family to family and from grade to grade.

7. Imagining what freedom would be like after 19 years on death row.
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Daniel is a foreigner in his new world. He moves around like a ghost and has lost sight of how to read social cues. He is equal parts wonder and darkness and it is confusing not knowing if he is guilty or not.

But watching him recalibrate to the modern world is mesmerizing -- him picking through the attic and finding his Walkman and mixtapes from high school. Sitting in a bathtub staring out at nothing. Shots of him riding a bike for the first time in 19 years. Or sitting in the middle of a field eating junk food that he bought at a convenience store. Daniel forgets to check his cell phone and his family worries. Neighbors who do not support his being out of prison come after him. He is a specimen in a test tube and we are all looking in. In fact, everything and everyone swirling around that test tube is stunning and heartbreaking all at once and it is impossible to look away.

Josh Altman Is Back! Tonight on Bravo...

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The Joshes are back! That's the good news and here's the bad: Sadly, there is no Madison Hildebrand on this season of Million Dollar Listing LA, beginning tonight on Bravo at 9 PM. Madison's colleagues Josh Flagg and Josh Altman - who could both easily bicker their way to a spin-off - will be back, and I can assure you after watching, each Josh will not disappoint as they bring the best of their dynamic personalities to the first episode.

Hildebrand released this statement through Bravo in response to his departure: "As an original cast member, I have made the decision to leave the show to focus on new and exciting endeavors. Sharing my life, career, relationships and challenges over the past six years has been an unbelievable journey and I loved every minute of it. I wish for the continued success for the franchise and want to thank my fans, Bravo and my family for all the support." Following his lengthy and vague statement, I was thrilled to get Altman's quick-take in his trademark smart ass style : "(Madison) decided to work on his tan full time...Before, it was just part time."

While I will miss what Madison brought to this always warring, competitive crew of real estate honchos in the hills, where inventory is low but the houses are high (priced), the season premiere is so bloody riveting, with its two new British real estate agents, that by the end you might be asking "Madison who?"

Oh, don't get angry Hildegrand fans. We still will miss Madison and his riffs with the Joshes, his soft-spoken, kind, albeit competitive nature to Josh Altman's ribbing, especially now as we will see Altman in finest form. While he may have previously come across as smarmy with seemingly underhanded tactics, those who love him - or love to hate him - will be captivated. Tonight, Altman will taunt the new blokes on the block (David Parnes and James Harris) by calling them "The Spice Girls" and "you boys" phrased as a paternal, more experienced and wiser challenge. As Altman reiterates to me, Parnes and Harris are in a league behind the Americans with regard to real estate, but we see that they seem poised to catch up, or at the very least, to full-on compete with the Joshes. Welcome to the all boys' club that is MDLLA and now: let's see if these two new recruits will sink or swim. (To its credit, Miami introduced a female cast member to its own Million Dollar counterpart.)

Altman may have stolen Heather away from Madison's firm several seasons ago, but he and Heather have been dating ever since and this season will portray the wedding planning, a process that Altman concedes is "definitely tougher than real estate!" We will also get to see the tantalizing way Josh Flagg charms and courts his clients, even if not entirely by choice. He seems to be the Cougar Crush of the season, with a client calling repeatedly and hanging up out of nervousness. Flagg, to his credit, takes the calls until he and the crushing client are connected.

After watching many of his antics in past seasons, I was a little nervous about conversing with Josh Altman. Maybe it's the innate bad association to my elementary school years and the boys I knew back then who teased just as much and more heartlessly. Hinting at this, but in more flattering fashion, Josh immediately puts me at ease with "Come on! You're just talking to a real estate agent."

He gives me the 411, laughing when I tell him that it is rumored that all the guys truly got along well behind the scenes, that fights were faked. "You must be talking about some other show. It is all real. We can't even be in the same room," he assures me. He makes it clear that Madison Hildebrand is not receiving a wedding invitation and that no tears were shed by he and his fiancé when the former left the show.

"Everyone liked the dynamic we had - Josh Flag, Madison, me...but these British guys came out swinging as far as what I've seen. They want to make a name for themselves and take the top guys down. There's a nice international presence, or at least, a good accent on the show. The properties shown this season are incredible, inventory is low and the market is better than ever." I pause here to note that this is a reality show about real estate and the 1 percent. I can't sell my little house in Jersey which is well below the price we paid. It seems to have shrunken mysteriously over the years.

Shifting my mind's zip codes from 0 to 9, Josh says: "Everyone is very competitive this season and you get to see a different side of me, a more vulnerable side as opposed to the alpha male, super aggressive, confident -some say 'cocky' - realtor."

"I'm excited for the audience to see my sentimental side," he relates reflectively, conveying that underneath the tough guy shenanigans, he is a boy in love with a girl and planning a wedding. Naturally, Bravo TV has captured the emotional roller coaster of that time period and all the frustrations that come with it for the couple, particularly for Heather.

I ask him how he and Josh Flagg are getting along now. Last season ended with a standoff between the two Joshes. Their big blow up was about a listing that Flagg may have snagged, although there is controversy over whose listing it was supposed to be in the first place. Altman, who has frequently ribbed at Flagg for being a "trust fund baby," mentioned Flagg's grandmother Edith during the fight, and that seemed to be a major point of contention for the latter.

Unforeseeable at the time, the wise Edith Flagg just passed away last week at age 94. She was a Holocaust survivor, philanthropist and the fashion designer who came to popularize polyester. On Bravo, she became a TV star alongside her grandson, as she gave him sage advice and fans tuned in and paid attention.

Altman expresses deep sympathies over Edith's death. He has reached out to Josh Flagg and to Flagg's family. Regarding the riff, he says that he and the other Josh have moved on from what we saw on TV last season and adds: "If I had to get bitch slapped by anyone, I would prefer to get bitch slapped by Josh Flagg."

In addition to the new British agents (Altman admits "One is more likable than the other, you'll see" and adds that "they are not in our league" - having brought in significantly lower sales last year - "but they like to think they are."), we will see more of Altman's brother and business partner at The Altman Brothers, Matt Altman. We will also get a taste of how the LA guys get along with our favorite cast members of Million Dollar Listing New York. Many viewers won't complain about seeing Ryan Serhant's face cross the coast lines of reality TV cartography. Altman concedes that NY's eye candy Realtor Ryan is the one who he knows least, but that he and Fredrik Eklund, also of MDLNY, frequently refer clients to one another and have a great working relationship.

While many have waxed philosophical "for the sake of 'sociological research'" about how reality shows are scripted, staged and fraught with retakes, Altman assures me that MDLLA is very real. "Someone always has to be working while the other is filming," he says, in response to why we haven't seen more of his brother Matt in the past. "At the end of the day, so few people can handle what we do with cameras in their faces 10 months out of the year and be successful." Tonight, we will also see that Heather is working with her fiance at The Altman Brothers. That should bring its own set of challenges...

All is staged for an interesting season - or as I'm repeatedly told with regard to MDLLA - "staged" is the wrong word, but you get my gist.

'Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles': 5 Reasons to Watch the New Cartoon, Not the Movie

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As Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles tops the box office for a second week in a row, we hate to say it, but a little part of our inner child dies. Between the 'roided out CGI turtles, the inevitable sexploitation of Megan Fox, and turtle lips (that should be enough right there), the new Turtles movie seemed poised to disappoint true fans from the get-go.

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Luckily, for those craving anthropomorphic turtles with martial arts skills that hits a little closer to home, Nickelodeon has you covered. The kids network made its own cartoon reboot in 2012 that manages to build upon the original while carving out an expanded, richer turtle-verse. The team at Nickelodeon created a surprisingly smart show with strongly developed characters and on-point nods to pop culture, classical movie genres, and hints of the original cartoon peppered throughout.

Here are five good reasons why your time and money will probably be better-spent at home bingeing on "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" the cartoon, presumably with a large pepperoni and anchovy pizza.

1. Nods to the original cartoon
It's clear the show's producers were wary of the nostalgia trap they were getting into with this project. But it's also clear they were fans of the 1987 series and wisely allowed the new show to build upon the original material, which can be felt in everything from the opening theme music to the Turtle's throwback technology. And while "Go Ninja, Go Ninja, Go" doesn't make a cameo, the pizza-throwing Turtle truck, the robotic mousers from the video game, and even Metalhead come back as recurring characters. We're still waiting on word of Vanilla Ice.

2. Familiar faces
As for original characters, many return with stronger backstories and motivations, but they still stay true to their original concepts. Baxter Stockman, for example, remains a meek scientist who eventually goes "Jeff Goldblum" and turns into a man-fly, but we find out why he views himself as evil and puts up with Shredder's abuse rather than just accepting his role as a subordinate.



3. Expanded Turtle-verse
Nickelodeon's Turtles remain true to their oozy origins, but instead of having a monster of the week format as '90s cartoons were prone to do, Nick's reboot has strong character arcs that last multiple seasons. And while protagonists like April O'Neil and Karai get a little more backstory, the fun comes in when the antagonists get their origin stories. The show is chock full of familiar faces like Baxter Stockman, Krang, and, of course, Shredder. Rather than merely establish them as bad guys, Nickelodeon has given them motivations and personalities that actually drive their characters: Shredder and Splinter's rivalry, for example, is deeply explored through the first season and leads into deeper consequences and revelations as the show progresses.

4. Voice acting talent
Sean Astin, a.k.a. Sam from the Lord of the Rings trilogy, Jason Biggs from Orange is the New Black (OK, he was also Jim from American Pie), and Seth Green are joining the cast. (Where does he find the time?)!

And while the curse of true voice actors is that their names usually aren't as recognizable as their voices, most will remember Rob Paulsen's when they hear him as Donatello. Not only was he the original Raphael, he was also Yakko Warner and Pinky from Animaniacs, another cult classic '90s cartoon.

5. High-level references
The Turtles reboot has its fair share of slapstick humor and, quite frankly, it wouldn't be the Turtles without a little bit of bad puns and pizza-in-the-face gags. But when it gets down to it, it's a smart show. It knows its audience by its references to pop culture and movie genres, without skipping a beat. Leo's favorite show is a Star Trek clone called "Space Heroes," one of the main henchman is a clear Chuck Norris spoof, and Mikey loves old-school horror films and insists on giving every new mutant a campy horror name like Snakeweed.

If you're interested in checking the series out and deciding for yourself which remake truly recaptures your childhood memories, Nick's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is currently available on most on-demand streaming services and is streamed ad-free on Hulu Plus.

John Sykes is a writer for Hulu.com.

Methadone for the TV-Binge-Watcher: What to Watch While Waiting for the Next 'Hit'

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Recently I was a guest on WNPR's Colin McEnroe Show in an ongoing segment entitled "The Scramble." In defiance of public radio logic, each week they have a "super-guest" select topics versus having topics dictate the guest.

The subjects I chose were the profitability of inclusive TV and film casting, whether humorists like David Sedaris should be fact-checked with the same vigor as other memoirists and methadone for the tv-binge-watcher -- what to watch while waiting for the next hit.

As often happens in live radio, the third segment got cut short due to time constraints, so I thought I'd post my picks here.

Being a mere mortal and not a mighty algorithm, my suggestions aren't as nuanced as Netflix's 76,897 genre categories, but I did my best to match common themes and tones to these wonderful shows that may be new to many viewers.

Mad Men
Part workplace drama, part spy-thriller, the BBC's The Hour is about a current-affairs news program and will bring you back to the era of chain smoking and martini lunches.

Like Mad Men, The Bletchley Circle (PBS) explores the theme of women's changing roles. Four gifted WWII code-breakers find themselves unchallenged by the traditional roles allotted to them after the war and use their skills to investigate a string of London murders.

House of Cards:
The BBC miniseries State of Play delivers scandal, political intrigue, and hero-journalists à la All the President's Men. (Do not confuse this with the Ben Affleck/Russell Crowe film adaptation.)

If you're interested in the inner-workings of Washington but are in the mood for something lighter, Amazon Originals' Alpha House, created by Garry Trudeau and starring John Goodman, is a clever comedy. (Full disclosure: I was so charmed by the pilot I begged my agent to get me an audition for a role -- no matter how big or small. She came through. I play Annie, the congressional nurse, in the episode entitled "The Rebuttal.")

The Walking Dead
After you're done with domestic zombies, try the French zombies in The Returned (Les Revenants). The Sundance Channel aired this French series, which is as chilling as it is beautiful.

Orange Is the New Black
HBO's Getting On revolves around another type of institution -- a hospital's geriatric extended care wing -- and also features complex female characters, stand out performances (Laurie Metcalf, Niecy Nash, Alex Borstein), and is equal parts painful and funny.

Girls
Men of a Certain Age might seem like a stretch, but this TNT series about three middle-aged men share themes of friendship and redefining oneself in a new stage of life.

No other tv show has resonated more with my own experience moving to New York City -- complete with hip-hop soundtrack -- than HBO's How to Make It in America. The show centers around two friends on the hustle to break into the fashion industry.

Homeland
AMC's Rubicon serves up its share of conspiracy theories, espionage, and government cover-ups (unfortunately, it didn't serve up a second season) in this thriller about a think tank analyst who uncovers a sinister scheme.

The BBC crime drama Luther is another show with a protagonist who is brilliant, struggling with demons, and willing to break the rules for the greater good. The scenes between DCI John Luther (Idris Elba) and genius psychopath Alice Morgan (Ruth Wilson) are just electric.

And if that doesn't sate you, my destination for smart tv talk is David Bianculli's blog www.TvWorthWatching.com.

A quick caveat: (1) I didn't include Breaking Bad because I thought the choice of another antihero (or "antivillian") show like Dexter or The Sopranos would be obvious, and (2) if you have not seen The Wire drop this and watch immediately. I don't care if you have a meeting with your new boss in five minutes -- the only impression you need to be making right now is on your couch.

So the next time you emerge into the sunlight, bleary-eyed after an all night bender and swearing you'll never to do this to yourself again... come nightfall, your DVDr-dealer will be waiting.

Tweet me your binge-worthy recommendations @actorwriterWTVR.

Pedro Zamora's Torch

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When I think of Pedro Zamora today, I tend to think less of what he accomplished when he was alive and more of the man he would be if he were still with us. He'd be 42 years old. I think he'd be married. I think he'd be living in San Francisco. I think he would have gone back to school and gotten a college degree -- or threatened to do it for a long time before receiving an honorary degree for a commencement speech and joking for the rest of his life, "This way was faster and cheaper." I think he'd be a father. And, most of all, I think he'd still be a teacher.

Pedro was an AIDS educator, a P.W.A. (person with AIDS), and an activist who came to national prominence as a member of the cast of MTV's The Real World: San Francisco. He gained meteoric fame and became an international face of those living with AIDS. He also knocked down barriers that existed for young gay men and women in a way that no one else had done before, and all this by being on television, but also by being a communicator with skills far beyond his years. He died the morning after the last of episode of The Real World: San Francisco aired. It was Nov. 11, 1994. He was 22 years old.

Earlier that year, when testifying before Congress after the death of a close friend, Pedro gave an impassioned, unscripted speech. He said to them that he didn't know who would carry their torch now that they were gone. He also said, "I wonder now, as I look around me: Who is going to carry my torch?"

"Who will carry Pedro's torch?" became a question for many of us who loved him, and for those who desired to see his message live on. So many of us have tried.

Now that nearly 20 years have passed since his death and I find myself thinking about the man he would be today -- the 42-year-old PWA, activist, and educator -- I'm also reminded of whom Pedro wanted to reach, and who he felt the messengers should be.

Pedro was a young man who taught, fought for and guided youth, and it is still young people who need to lead us. That's why we were so heartened to hear that the National AIDS Memorial Grove had renamed their college-scholarship program the Pedro Zamora Young Leaders Scholarship. It is dedicated to continuing Pedro's legacy by supporting the academic efforts of emerging young leaders who share Pedro's passionate commitment to ending the HIV/AIDS pandemic.

I know that if Pedro were alive today, he would be both heartened and disappointed. In an era where, for so many, HIV/AIDS has now become a treatable disease and not a death sentence, in a time where gays and lesbians can live openly and even legally marry in many states, he'd be elated. But with young people still the number-one group contracting HIV, and with the lives of the gay community being used as a constant political wedge issue, he'd know what we know: that there is still so much more work to do.

We can still learn a great deal from Pedro. We welcome and challenge the recipients of the Pedro Zamora Young Leaders Scholarship to honor his memory and carry his torch.

Watching TV Together Can Help Couples Get Closer

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By Kelly Coleman for KnowMore.tv's GalTime

America's favorite pastime has always been watching TV, but who knew that it could actually benefit your relationship? If you and your partner watch the right kind of shows together, it can inspire conversations, provide a quality bonding experience and even spice up your sex life, according to experts.

The Best Genres To Watch With Your Partner

Different genres of television can provide for a variety of needs. Humorous sitcoms, for instance, are great for sharing a laugh. "Laughing sends endorphins to our brains and makes us feel good," says dating coach Leonardo Bustos, or the "Companionator." fBustos explains that when humans share endorphin-rich activities or moments, it creates a bonding experience. "I find that Modern Family and Seinfeld are lighthearted and can be counted on to make the humdrum of everyday events hilarious--a vital technique to a happy life."

"More plot-driven dramas (e.g. Breaking Bad, House of Cards, Orange Is the New Black, etc.) can allow you and your partner to venture on a virtual journey together and give you a nightly or weekly topic of conversation. You can chat about who your favorite character is, what you predict will happen next and discuss whether so-and-so did the right thing.

These types of exchanges can turn into 'big picture' conversations. In this vein, any show could be a jumping point from which you can start a great debate or an opportunity to discuss values (e.g. do you think certain reality TV characters' behavior is hilarious or contemptible? Why?).

It's important for couples to diversify their TV-watching, says Silvia Dutchevici, Founder and President of the Critical Therapy Center in New York City. She suggests including documentaries and the news in your TV-together-time. These outlets help "expose each other to the way they see and understand the world," Dutchevici says.

Watching TV Together Can Inspire Intimacy

No matter what you're watching, the physical act of viewing TV is the perfect opportunity to squeeze in some cuddle time. If you combine the feeling of enjoyment you get from watching TV with the comfort of snuggling with your partner, you'll create a positive association between the two activities. Rather than using TV as a time-filler, you should see it as a special activity for the two of you to share.

TV can also provide some inspiration for your sex life. Watching actors steam up the screen can help get you in the mood, give you ideas for some new moves, or even live out sexual fantasies by reenacting your favorite scenes line by line. Some safe bets are Game of Thrones or True Blood --any of those hot and heavy HBO series -- if you can get past all of the blood and gore.

Watching TV Can Help Open The Lines Of Communication

Making decisions about TV-watching habits may sound trivial, but in reality, the negotiation skills that go into TV choices and schedules can be indicative of you and your partners' general negotiating skills, according to Dutchevici. "Much like the way a couple negotiates who washes the dishes, when laundry is done, etc., the way a couple decides to watch TV is a reflection of how they negotiate other (bigger) things in the relationship," she explains. "Healthy relationships have open communication and negotiation."

If so much of you and your partner's lives are going to be devoted to watching TV, ensure that this big chunk of time is healthy for your relationship.

More from KnowMore.tv's GalTime:

Pretty Takes Practice -- Inside and Out
What May Be Causing Your Low Sex Drive (And How To Fix It)
Twitter Could Be Sabotaging Your Marriage
What Naughty Dreams About Your Ex Actually Mean

5 Reasons Why the VMAs No Longer Matter

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If video really did kill the radio star, MTV may have in turn killed its own creation: the video. For years, of course, the network has seemingly been video-phobic, devoting nearly all of its time to reality shows, scripted dramas and other programs that beg the question of why the letter "M" still appears in its name. Once a year, though, MTV remembers that videos still exist (even if they air primarily on other cable networks and internet sites) and celebrates them.

But if 2014's show is any indication, the party is over.

The Video Music Awards have become a halfhearted, one-dimensional, and quite frankly inexplicable use of airtime, and in the post-TRL years have become about as relevant and vital as the music video itself. Once an important date on every celebrity's calendar, the VMA broadcast has outgrown its purpose. TruTV doesn't blow the cobwebs off of old Court TV shows once a year, so why does MTV continue pretending to care about its legacy by holding an event that celebrates the videos it no longer even shows? Here are five reasons why, as its 2014 broadcast showed, the Video Music Awards no longer matter.

1. Lack of interest. MTV's biggest night of the year kicked off with a high-octane performance by Nicki Minaj that featured a lot of booty-shaking, crotch-grabbing and floor-grinding, but perhaps more shocking than any of that -- because let's face it, what part of that hasn't been done on the VMAs before? -- was the wide shot that revealed a large number of empty seats in the Forum's lower level. True, some fans were still filtering in from outside when the show started, but the fact that they were in no rush to get to their seats only shows how missable this show has become, even for live attendees. Plus, the Forum was hardly a sellout -- the day before the show, plenty of seats were still available through Ticketmaster, including entire rows. Even MTV itself seemed to not care that much -- as soon as the live show had ended, the network immediately showed it again. No post-show interviews, no analysis of the winners, nothing. The next day, entertainment giant TMZ had hardly any VMA coverage that didn't involve a pre-party shooting that had occurred the night before.

2. Lack of diversity. Among the biggest knocks on MTV's early years was that, until Michael Jackson broke its unspoken color barrier with "Billie Jean," the network was almost exclusively a celebration of rock music. In 2014, the closest that the VMA broadcast came to the network's flagship genre was what it teased as "a rockin' performance" from Australian boy band 5 Seconds of Summer, which turned out to pretty much be a ballad that happened to feature a couple of guitars. Still, they should be commended for at least playing something -- other than Maroon 5 and Usher (who briefly held a bass that he may or may not have actually even been playing), none of the night's performers even touched an instrument. On a night when current or former judges from The Voice, American Idol, and The X Factor appeared as presenters or performers, MTV showed that the only type of musician that still matters is the female pop vocalist who can sing while backed by a prerecorded track and scores of dancers.

3. Lack of credibility. The only thing weaker than the field of nominees in some categories were the winners themselves. Drake picked up a Moonman for Best Hip Hop Video for "Hold On (We're Going Home)," a song that features no rapping and, since the show doesn't offer an award for R&B videos, was probably better suited for inclusion in the Pop category. (See number one above for why Drake didn't even bother showing up to accept his award, despite having a four-day hole in his tour schedule.) Best Rock Video, meanwhile, went not to a legitimate rock nominee like Linkin Park or the Black Keys, but rather to Lorde's "Royals," which is the 2014 equivalent of Jethro Tull defeating Metallica for the Grammy for Best Hard Rock/Metal Performance. And the Artist To Watch trophy, as voted on by fans -- at least those in the nation's time zones that saw the show live -- went to Fifth Harmony, a Simon Cowell creation that, based on the response by the crowd inside the Forum every time the award's nominees were shown, were only a fraction as popular as fellow nominees 5 Seconds of Summer or Sam Smith.

4. Lack of celebrity. The Video Music Awards used to be a huge event that drew not only the biggest names in music, but also hip, young stars from film, TV, standup comedy and sports. In 2014, among the non-music stars who appeared on stage were nearly 40-year-old comic Chelsea Handler and nearly 60-year-old actor Jeff Daniels. Sure, they tried to shoehorn Robin Williams into the show, but his tribute segment was so arbitrary and awkward, it might as well have not been part of the broadcast at all. Hey MTV, want to pull in more TV stars? Don't hold your broadcast the night before the Emmys.

5. Lack of purpose. Short of serving as a glorified twerk-off, what did the 2014 Video Music Awards actually contribute to popular music? Is anyone discussing the show's winners? (Is anyone discussing the show at all?) Self-promotion was a big part of the evening: presenters Jason Derulo and Demi Lovato used their stage time to mention their own upcoming concert tours while introducing Maroon 5; Miley Cyrus, meanwhile, won the once-coveted Video Of The Year award for "Wrecking Ball," and allotted her acceptance-speech time to someone who spoke about homelessness, which was admirable... until he got to the part about having to go to Miley's Facebook page for more information.

Celebrating music videos should have been the purpose of the show, but Beyonce won the Michael Jackson Video Vanguard Award -- named for a guy who not only carved out a spot for African-American musicians on MTV, but also revolutionized the music video itself -- and gave a nearly 20-minute concert, yet made no mention of the videos that won her the award to begin with. Worse, "Single Ladies" -- the song that served as the basis for what Kanye West infamously proclaimed during the 2009 VMAs as "one of the best videos of all time" -- wasn't even part of her medley of hits.

If MTV were to set aside even an hour or two of its daily schedule for airing videos, the Video Music Awards might still have a chance. The landscape has changed, however, and while there is still a need for a fun music-awards show that can balance the uptight Grammys broadcast, the VMAs are no longer it.

The Awkward Parenting Story I Probably Shouldn't Tell

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At a recent speaking event, a brave woman stood up and said to me, "G, can you tell us about your worst mom moment?"

"Shoot. No." I said. "I can't. I'd like to, but I really can't here. I'll get us in trouble."

But I can tell you here. I probably shouldn't, but this story is begging me to tell it so here we are. The stories are the bosses of me.

ONLY READ THIS ESSAY IF:

1. You do not get upset about accidental swearing at children.

2. You enjoy essays with absolutely no take away. No lesson, no tips, nothing.

3. You watched "Breaking Bad" and maybe had a teeny weeny itty bitty bad boy crush on Jesse -- like perhaps you found yourself deciding that meth dealing and repeated murder aren't TOTAL deal breakers at all, really. Nobody's perfect, after all.

All right -- if you're still here -- let's do this.

A few months ago Craig and I started watching "Breaking Bad" every night. We loved "Breaking Bad" -- even though Craig would often reach over and manually close my mouth which hung wide open in utter shock during all the hours of that series. I found the show to be quite upsetting in all the best ways. So every night we got the kids to bed as quickly as possible and burrowed into our little slice of heaven which is our snuggly green couch and BAM -- all the drama would unfold in front of our tired eyes.

One afternoon during that time -- I found myself in the family room playing Uno with my daughters. I was there with the girls -- but not really there with them -- if you know what I mean. Because I was playing Uno. With a kindergartener and a second grader who mostly hate each other because they have not yet discovered that their angsty, conflicted, passionate feelings regarding each other are really love. So they fight and they fight and then when they are done fighting they plan their next fight. I know that there are spiritual people who insist that staying in the moment is heaven, but those people have never played Uno with my daughters. Playing Uno with my daughters could certainly be compared to an afterworld, but I might point you towards the other one. The one with the fire and torture and wailing and gnashing of teeth and ruing the day you were born. And so my body was there playing cards but my mind was thinking about Jesse and how on earth this sweet boy was going to get out of these unfortunate meth/murder situations he kept finding himself in due to no fault of his precious own.

All of a sudden, I was snapped out of my daydream and back to my senses by someone tapping me on the leg and saying: "Your turn." Since most of the time I live in my head -- this moment is the story of my life. This moment when I'm happily lost inside my mind world and someone in my physical world tries to bring me back to the present -- so I have to quickly figure out who I'm with, where I am, and what's going on. This is why we daydreaming introverts seem constantly dazed and confused. We are like scuba divers who are down in the deep on a quiet treasure hunt but are constantly being yanked back up above water. It takes us some time to surface and reorient.

Searching for a clue -- I looked down at my hand and saw one Uno card sitting in my palm. This was a GREAT clue! I was playing Uno, apparently! And Look! I only had one card left! Which meant I was WINNING! Ba-Bam! And before I had any clue what I was doing -- I held my card in the air and yelled:

"UNO, BITCHES!"

I yelled Uno, bitches, at my 5-year-old and 7-year-old daughters. I called my daughters bitches. With great glee and gusto. In the middle of a family card game.

Somehow -- I had subconsciously channeled Jesse. Jesse says that, not me. I don't call people bitches. I do curse, actually. But more like a sailor and less like Paris Hilton. And normally not at my very small, precious, pigtailed children. Maybe AROUND them accidentally -- like when I can't get the front door open or drop something on my toe - but not AT them. Unless they secretly eat my ice cream, of course. But what I'm saying is -- barely ever.

You guys. The "UNO BITCHES!" hung in the air like one of those word clouds. It just SAT THERE while we all stared at it silently.

I looked up and Craig was standing in the door jam. This was his face, which I asked him to re-enact for this retelling.

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I stared back at him like this.

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And then I forced myself to look at my girls -- who were watching me exactly how I watch Breaking Bad -- mouths hung open, eyes wide, frozen stiff.

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Sorry, I said.

So sorry.

Sorry about all that.

And that was all. Because I really couldn't explain Breaking Bad Scuba Diving to them. Couldn't.

I won Uno.

And we went about our business.

That's it. I will not be wrapping this story up with a bow and a nice lesson and a take-away. I got nothing for you.

I called my sweet girls bitches. And even so, I'll have you know that Amazon calls me an official parenting expert. And so here's the thing: if you do not call your children bitches -- I imagine that you must be some sort of parenting GURU. Good for YOU. Really. Well done.

There you go -- there's your take away. You are an AMAZING parent. Go forth today with great parental confidence and dignity, bitches.

Love,
G (Parenting expert)

This post originally appeared on Momastery.



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August

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I wasn't supposed to walk away from the NFL, but I did. I wasn't supposed to be writing television, but I am. I'm supposed to be lost after football. I'm not. I've reinvented myself. This is my first transformation. I'm supposed to be broke right now, or maybe the statistics say five years from now. Either way, I'm not even close. I'm not supposed to be anything but a football player. But really, I'm just a guy who used to play football. There's a reason I'm doing this.

The last few months of my life are a true example of the fact that everything "they" say can be wrong. I believe it usually is.

It's largely assumed that there is only one way to happiness/success. Most often it's some variation of going to college, finishing school, landing a good job, getting married, having a family, putting your personal desires aside and after many years of this you leave whatever you can for your children, retire and wait till it's your turn to go. Now, I'm sure this structure works for a lot of people, but can this exact model be right for everyone?

Any person I've known, met or studied that has done something great and found their joy has done it by following a passion or an idea that felt right to them. Even if they were alone in it, they chased that desire without fear and trusted that things would turn out. They believed so deeply in their truth, that it was manifested and actually became their reality.

A question I like to ask people I'm meeting, or even people who I know, is 'If you could be anything in the world, without any restriction or it even being realistic, what would you be?'

It always sparks an interesting conversation. One guy even told me he'd want to be an assassin. I backed away slowly... However, beyond the fun and imaginings it's surprising to me how often the things that people say they truly want to do are actually very possible. They literally can be done. The strongest hesitation is the fear of stepping off course and doing something uncertain. Though certainty provides a strong level of comfort, the question is, will it please your soul?

"If you want guarantees in life, then you don't want life." -- The Creator

A few months ago I moved to Santa Monica and became a member of the Writers Guild of America, West. I'm on the writing team of a new show that will air on HBO next summer. A year ago, a writing career was just a tiny seed of thought as I prepared for my sixth NFL season. And as I write this now, it has already begun to sprout. Through this experience I've learned that you can will your dreams into existence.

If only I wouldn't have taken that step...

MasterChef Recap: Stop Yelling At Me! in 'Top 7 Compete'

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Note: Do not read on if you have not seen Season 5, Episode 11 of FOX's "MasterChef," titled "Top 7 Compete."

I hate tag team challenges -- it gives me Leslie-like stress.

But we can start at the beginning. The contestants al get letters from home that make them cry and then they have to cook a savory apple dish. No sweets. Courtney, smug little thang, wins, though I was feeling Christian's stuffed chop.

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So, for the elimination challenge, Courtney is safe. She gets to pick the teams and she is harsh. Jaimie and Leslie. Elizabeth and Cutter. Misery ensues. They have to make dim sum in a tag team like set up. So everyone's yelling at each other. Willie and Christian are going at it Jaime can't stop whining. Courtney is just laughing.

Every time Gordon yells "switch!" my blood pressure rises. Willie even has a minute because it's loud and stressful. We are now watching people have panic attacks for fun. Guilty as charged.

Switch!

Elizabeth trips over herself and pops back up. People are barely able to steam their shumai. It's a mess and I'm waiting for someone to cry.

Jaime and Leslie: Looks good, tastes good, despite the bickering.

Willie and Christian: Good communication and usually good technique make it hard for the judges to believe how ugly and tasteless their dim sum is.

Elizabeth and Cutter: "It looks horrendous. Like canned dog food," says Gordon. Courtney set my girl up. Switch!

At the end of the day, it's Willie who has to leave. I know he's a fan fave, but I was starting to sense his time was up. You?

It's down to the wire, my foodie friends. Who are you rooting for? Let me know in the comments or @karenfratti.

'MasterChef' airs Mondays at 8 p.m. on FOX.

Attention, Hollywood: This Is How We Really Should Be Talking About Mental Illness

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Hollywood personalities and media professionals have a way of adding joy to our lives, and for their services, we reward them with adoration (and outsized paychecks). But with that celebrity comes a certain burden of responsibility to use their public platforms for good and not ignorance -- especially when it comes to sensitive issues.

PSA to all public figures out there: Yes, that includes any thoughts on mental illness.

On this week's episode of So You Think You Can Dance, judge and producer Nigel Lythgoe made several remarks on suicide and mental illness -- comments that didn't sit well on social media for those who are tirelessly working to have encouraging conversations about these disorders.

"Anybody who's lost a friend or somebody they cared for because of the stupidity of suicide ... there's always somebody there ... to pick you up and help you," he said. "Suicide is not God's plan for our lives, and there is always somebody there, you just gotta find them."

His comments about suicide also continued on Twitter:

I will not even begin to defend my feelings toward suicide. The belief that life is not worth living is wrong. The belief that there is no one out there to help you is wrong. The defense of suicide victims is wrong. The devastation that is left behind with family and friends is wrong! I repeat taking away your pain by committing suicide is both stupid and selfish!
-- @dizzyfeet


My last word on this, of course not all suicides can be stopped. Because a mentally ill person is incapable of judgement does not make the act of suicide any less stupid or selfish. If one person can be saved, if one life can be turned around by letting them know someone is there for them, and I know a few that have been, then that's all we can do!
-- @dizzyfeet


This is not to say that the statements didn't come from good-hearted intentions -- Lythgoe said he recently lost two people close to him to suicide, an act that takes nearly 40,000 American lives every year. The pain loved ones feel after these events is unimaginable for anyone who hasn't experienced it. His advocacy for prevention -- and his message that suicide is not the answer -- was on point, but his delivery method was less than desirable. Using phrases like "stupid" in conjunction with the topic of mental illness doesn't shed the stigma, it perpetuates it.

Lythgoe's unfortunate wording comes from a long line of misguided commentary from public figures. A few weeks ago, Fox News anchor Shepard Smith sounded off about the death of beloved actor Robin Williams, calling him a "coward" for committing suicide. KISS frontman Gene Simmons also made insensitive remarks about mental illness recently, telling Songfacts.com in an interview that he doesn't get along with anybody who "has a dark cloud over their head and sees themselves as a victim."

Our conversation about mental illness needs to be a positive, healthy dialogue, not one laden with shame. As soon as that begins to happen, we'll be able to address these health issues more effectively. More importantly, it will encourage those suffering to get the professional help they need and deserve -- without the fear of being called "stupid."

---

Have a story about depression that you'd like to share? Email strongertogether@huffingtonpost.com, or give us a call at (860) 348-3376, and you can record your story in your own words. Please be sure to include your name and phone number.

Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-273-8255 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.

7 Best New Fall TV Shows for Teens and Families

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By Sierra Filucci, Common Sense Media TV Editor

For serious TV fans, fall is a time to get excited about a new crop of network shows. Unfortunately, much of this season's lineup is too edgy for whole-family viewing. Still, there is hope if you're looking for something good to watch with your kids -- especially older kids. We've sifted through this fall's new stuff for titles that could work for families, plus some classic shows that offer fun watch-together experiences. And remember, there are plenty of family-friendly shows available through streaming services such as Netflix and Amazon.

Utopia, Fox, 9/7, likely age 12+

The idea behind this new reality show is ambitious: Fifteen folks from across the country come together to try to build a new society. They must work to meet the group's basic needs and see if they can thrive over the course of a year together. Of course, this is a reality show looking for drama, so the cast comes from highly diverse backgrounds. They'll have to learn to live together to succeed (or argue enough to keep the ratings high!). Without a full preview screener, we can't judge how appropriate the content will be for all ages, but we're expecting some heated talk and romantic moments, as well as the full range of social behavior -- both positive and negative. On the plus side, Utopia may spark some interesting conversations about society, politics, religion and other weighty topics.

You might also consider: Survivor

Red Band Society, Fox, 9/17, age 13+

Teen fans of The Fault in Our Stars will find something to love in this kids-with-cancer (and other dire illnesses) drama. Narrated by Charlie, a kid in a coma, Red Band Society covers some familiar teen territory -- romance, testing limits, experimenting with substances -- but against the backdrop of unsure futures, which makes it all easier to forgive. The moments of hope, connection and living life to the fullest will appeal to both teens and parents, and Octavia Spencer as the snarky but sweet nurse lends some serious cred to the show.

You might also consider: Friday Night Lights

Scorpion, CBS, 9/22, age 13+

A band of genius misfits works together to avert disaster -- just in the nick of time! This story might not be entirely original, but the cast, including Katharine McPhee (Smash) and Elyes Gabel (the former Dothraki warrior from Game of Thrones) adds a quirky charm, and the tension of each week's catastrophe makes watching a thrill. Families who get into taut procedurals and technology might enjoy watching together. However, certain episodes could touch on serious issues such as kidnapping or war, so read the episode description before watching with kids.

You might also consider: MacGyver

Black-ish, ABC, 9/24, age 12+

Anthony Anderson is hilarious as successful family man Dre Johnson. He appreciates his high-powered job, his smart, sexy physician wife (Tracee Ellis Ross), and his four adorable kids, but he feels something's missing. That something is a strong racial identity. With his teen son playing field hockey instead of hoops and going by "Andy" instead of "Andre," he's looking for a way to reconnect his family to his culture. The lighthearted take on race in America is handled delicately, but it's still a sensitive subject that not everyone will feel comfortable laughing about. For parents and teens who do, this comedy can bring lots of joy.

You might also consider: The Cosby Show

The Flash, CW, 10/7, age 13+

Superhero fans who like their stories dark and broody will love this modern take on the DC comic hero. Barry Allen's only 11 when his mother is murdered by a mysterious force and his father is wrongly accused of the crime. Raised by a family friend, Barry (Grant Gustin) grows up to be a charmingly nerdy scientist with a crush on his closest friend, Iris (Candice Patton). But when an industrial accident sends a powerful electrical current across the city, Barry finds himself transformed into a "meta-human" with super speed and incredible healing powers. But he's not the only one changed. He uses his newfound talents to take on super-powered bad guys while keeping his new identity a secret. Teens and parents who can deal with lots of action, a bit of romance and some fantasy violence will find fun here.

You might also consider: Arrow

Cristela, ABC, 10/10, age 12+

Sometimes, a traditional sitcom -- laugh track and all -- can be a comforting way to spend a half hour with the family. Cristela isn't original by any means, but the star of the show -- Cristela Alonzo -- is one of the most charming newcomers on television. Her smile and wit outshine the drab sitcom setting, and her comic delivery make even the stereotypical humor glow. We hope Cristela's charm will win enough viewers to upgrade the writing and the set, but if not, we look forward to seeing Cristela on a better show in the future.

You might also consider: The Middle

How We Got to Now, PBS, 10/15, age 10+

Fans of science shows such as Cosmos or Nova will find science writer Steven Johnson's informative dive into the past fascinating. You'll take in-depth tours of the history and science behind such modern marvels as the sewers that keep our streets free of poop and the clocks that keep the trains running on time. How We Got to Now is perfect family fare for curious kids and parents to watch together (just don't expect too many explosions). It might even encourage kids to explore and experiment after the show is over.

You might also consider: Cosmos


Related Posts
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First Times: Tips for Talking About Virginity and Sex in Teen Dramas
16 Great Shows You've Never Heard Of


About Common Sense Media
Common Sense Media is dedicated to improving the lives of kids and families by providing the trustworthy information, education, and independent voice they need to thrive in a world of media and technology. We exist because our kids are growing up in a culture that profoundly impacts their physical, social, and emotional well-being. We provide families with the advice and media reviews they need in order to make the best choices for their children. Through our education programs and policy efforts, Common Sense Media empowers parents, educators, and young people to become knowledgeable and responsible digital citizens. For more information, go to:www.commonsense.org.

Why 'Badass British Lady Detectives' Should Be Your Favorite Netflix Category

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If the first thing you think of when someone mentions British television is 'Downton Abbey,' I get it. I do. I'm someone who watched the new season 5 trailer approximately 47 times and traveled two hours to an exhibition of costumes from the show.

But if 'Downton Abbey' is all you know of British TV, you're missing out. Big time. There's an entire genre -- Vulture calls it British Women Getting It Done -- where women take matters into their own hands to solve crimes, save lives and sometimes, God forbid, knock a few strands of hair out of place.

These ladies aren't your mother's Miss Marple.

Happy Valley

Sarah Lancashire's Sergeant Catherine Cawood rolls with the punches and takes more than a few as she hunts down a kidnapper in this brutally brilliant West Yorkshire drama. With nary a gun in sight, confrontations between police and bad guys are unsparingly raw; after some criticized the violence, creator Sally Wainwright took a stand: "If you get your head smacked against the wall, you bleed. It's life." ('Downton Abbey' connection: an unrecognizable Siobhan Finneran -- scheming lady's maid O'Brien -- as Catherine's sister, Clare.)



The Fall

Whether giving orders to a roomful of Belfast policemen or telling off a journalist, Gillian Anderson as DSI Stella Gibson is always the calmest, coolest person on the scene without raising her voice or letting even a wee splatter of blood mar her now-famous silk shirts. Gibson's 'drop the mic' moment comes when she tells a serial killer his actions are "just misogyny: age-old violence against women."



The Bletchley Circle

While not technically detectives, these four female codebreakers-turned-super-sleuths team up to catch a serial murderer in 1952 London, outwitting both the cunning killer and the all-male police force with skills like logic, puzzle solving and pattern recognition.



Prime Suspect

Before Helen Mirren was an Academy Award-winning Queen, she was Jane Tennison. Tennison had her demons, including a fight with alcoholism and a battle against sexist colleagues, but throughout 'Prime Suspect''s seven-season run, she kicked butt, took names and was unapologetically the HBIC.



Looking for more non-British, but equally badass, female detectives? Meet Sarah Lund of Denmark's 'Forbrydelsen' (remade in America as 'The Killing'), Phryne Fisher of Australia's 'Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries' and Robin Griffin of New Zealand-set 'Top of the Lake.'

Is your favorite take-charge lady detective missing? Leave recommendations in the comments section or Tweet me.

Pretty Little Liars 512: 'Taking This One to the Grave'

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Co-Authors: Jaymie Bailey, All Things PLL | Tara Filliater, Crazy PLL 901

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I'm still shocked at Pretty Little Liars midseason finale and trying to cope with the death of my favorite non-Liar. (Spoiler alert for anyone who hasn't been on Twitter or the internet in the last week...) Rest in Peace Mona, you died and a little piece of my PLL-heart died too. Thankfully I've got the greatest PLL experts ever on my side: Jaymie Bailey, founder of All Things PLL and Tara Filliater, founder of Crazy PLL 901 are here to discuss "Taking This One to the Grave."

VB: Last week we mentioned the possibility of Mona being killed, how will her death affect the Liars?

Jaymie: I want to start by expressing my love for Janel Parrish and what she brought to Mona Vanderwaal. People would think it's nearly impossible to like a character who tortured the Liars for years, but they'd be wrong. I loved Mona so much, and that's in big thanks to Janel and what she did with that character. Mona won't be in present day Rosewood, but I am glad that Janel will still be a series regular in flashbacks. If she was completely off the show, I'd consider not watching. Maybe.

Tara: I'm shell-shocked Mona died! Yes, it was a possibility, but I honestly never thought the reality would become true. As far as the Liars go, I think this will send them on a roller coaster. They're most likely going to have it in their minds that Ali killed Mona, so they'll be terrified. It's sad to see this death as soon as the Liars realized Mona was doing this out of rage and never truly had intentions of hurting them.

Jaymie: Mona's death is probably the biggest thing to happen on the show. Mona knows so much, and she was willing to help the girls despite the danger that put her in. She believed Alison was "A," and that she could prove it! This is a major death in the girls' lives. Hanna is going to be heartbroken. It will affect her the most, even if she doesn't have the fondest memories of Mona. Mona holds some important information and that's why she's where she is now. The girls are going to be more determined than ever to figure out the "A" game so no one else in their lives will suffer.

I know Ali's the prime suspect, but if you look carefully the murderer's hairstyle changes. Who really killed Mona?

Jaymie: I think whoever killed Mona is wearing the blonde wig we've seen around Rosewood, and I think "A's" face is the last thing Mona sees before she dies. My guess right now is CeCe Drake or Lucas wearing a wig. I think CeCe is still part of the "A" game and Mona tortured Lucas, I'm not sure a couple of how-to-be-popular lessons allowed him to forgive Mona for everything she did.

Tara: I honestly don't think Ali killed Mona. I have a few theories on who killed her: 1) Mona's mom. We meet her for the first time and all of a sudden she is asking Hanna if A has started up again, which is interesting. Then we see her outside Principal Hackett's office lying to Mona, and then she leaves. Did she come back? 2) It's a man in a wig. 3) Meredith, Byron's Mistress. This is a long-shot, but Meredith will always be in my mind as someone big in the A Team because she was the main person in Marlene King's directing debut. Byron said she was sent away for HELP... Radley perhaps?

We all seem to agree Ali didn't kill Mona, but that doesn't mean she's in the clear. Ali may have targeted Bethany after discovering her mother had an affair with Bethany's father. Could Ali have lured Bethany to the yard to kill her?

Jaymie: Absolutely. Like Spencer said, Bethany was wearing an identical outfit to Alison's for a reason. I think she definitely could have lured Bethany there to talk about the affair. Also, I believe it's a possibility Jason has a twin sister who went a little crazy and was sent away to Radley. The truth will unfold, and everything going on revolves around Alison.

Tara: I have been thinking long and hard about this one. I can't believe Mrs. D and Mr. Young were having an affair! Now, the main question is... for how long? And why is Mrs. D visiting Bethany? Let's say hypothetically that this affair happened a very long time ago... like perhaps Bethany is Mrs. D's daughter before Ali was born. That would make them sisters. Mrs. D was embarrassed about her affair so she sent Bethany to Radley.

She then had Ali with Mr. D and treated her like a queen. Eventually, Mr. Young gets mad that his lover is treating their daughter like crap and goes to the yard and sees Alison... and hits her on the head. Yes, that's right, I am almost thinking Bethany's father hit Ali! Then Mrs. D buries Ali freaking out and walking along she sees Bethany... She hits Bethany.

That would take the blame off my favorite Liar, Spencer. She's arrested for Bethany's murder and there's no definitive proof yet she isn't the one who struck Bethany with a shovel.

Tara: There's always been the possibility in my mind that Spencer could have in fact killed Bethany. I know I'm contradicting what I just said, but... I mean you can never just have one theory in Rosewood!

Jaymie: I don't believe Spencer had anything to do with Bethany Young's murder. She had every intention to hurt Alison, but I think after Ali pointed out Spencer's actions she headed back to the barn. Melissa's hands have the dirt on them, but her video left too much to the imagination for people not to point fingers at her sister. Spencer did have a shovel in her hand. Bethany did get hit in the head. But I don't believe those two are connected.

As much as I hate to say this, why didn't Melissa say this to Spencer face-to-face? Does she have another motive for leaving a video behind? She admitted to burying Bethany but the cops are putting Spencer in handcuffs for this murder. I want to see the evidence they have against her because as far as I'm concerned, there is no definitive answer to who hit Bethany Young. Melissa Hastings buried her. That's all we know.

What are some other stand-out moments? Personally I really want to know why Ali is sneaking away to a secluded barn and who she's meeting there.

Tara: Several things--
Granny Rose: One thing that sticks out when Aria says her grandmother's name, "Granny ROSE." Rose seems like a pretty common thing in PLL: "April Rose has the proof" Rosewood, Apple ROSE Grill. I think it's curious.
The Field: Does anyone remember Duncan Albert? The mysterious man from Brookhaven that Ali trusted with everything. She told him about Vivian Darkbloom and A. He said the weekend Ali ran away he took her to an abandoned field, just like Paige described. I don't know what's going on, but it definitely sounds interesting.

Jaymie: Alison herself is what stood out to me this week, specifically her scene with Emily. Alison's face changes within seconds of Emily showing even the slightest compassion for her. Alison believes she has the Liars wrapped around her finger and she knows just how to move their strings.

Another scene that stands out is Alison at Mona's murder scene. Not only was she there, but she was smirking. It takes a lot for me to dislike Alison (just because Sasha Pieterse plays evil so well), but I was legitimately mad at her during that scene. One of my favorite characters is pronounced dead, but she's standing there with a look of satisfaction on her face. I want to know what she's up to, and I still want to have hope she's being evil for a good reason.

I hold out hope Ali's doing this for the right reasons too but you're right - that smirk on her face at Mona's crime scene has me seriously questioning her.

With a fan-appreciation hour replacing their traditional Halloween episode we'll have to wait until this December for any answers. Until then we'll be here to keep examining our favorite show, so stay tuned for more in-depth analyses from your resident PLL experts!

Pretty Little Liars airs on ABC Family. Image used with express permission.

Breaking Bad, Sherlock, and Television's Golden Age of Anti-Heroes

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This year's Emmy Awards proved to be very big for Breaking Bad and, at least numerically, a little bit bigger for Sherlock. The BBC's updating of Arthur Conan Doyle's classic detective carted away seven Emmy Awards in the miniseries and television movie categories, one more than Breaking Bad, one of the critical shows in this golden age of television, for its final season as a regular dramatic series. But the AMC drama garnered the biggest award, that for Best Dramatic Series.

And, of course, a fourth and final best dramatic actor award -- no one has won more -- for Bryan Cranston's indelible portrayal of Walter White. With Sherlock's brilliant English actor Benedict Cumberbatch winning for the first time on his third nomination in his category for miniseries and television movie, the awards also became a celebration of this era of anti-heroic characters on television.

The irony is that the biggest movies are going in a very different direction.

Guardians of the Galaxy became the top grossing movie at the domestic box office over this Labor Day weekend. The film it just zoomed past? Why, it's Marvel Cinematic Universe sibling Captain America: The Winter Soldier.

Cap 2 is, by far, the best action movie of the year, as well as one of the best superhero movies ever and a very gripping political conspiracy thriller.

Guardians is, well, an offbeat, funny, and ultimately heartfelt phenomenon. I wrote about that a little while back.

While superheroes, whether relatively perfect like Captain America or offbeat like the Guardians or spiky like Tony Stark aka Iron Man, reign in the movies, anti-heroes continue to grip audiences and critics alike in this golden age of television drama.



"Who are you talking to right now? Who is it you think you see?" Walter White clarifies matters for concerned wife Skyler.


Not long before the Emmys we'd seen the return of a long acclaimed and iconic anti-hero presence, 24's Jack Bauer. Kiefer Sutherland's Jack Bauer seems to me to be more the very troubled hero than an anti-hero. And in that he remained a potent presence in the successful 12-episode run of 24: Live Another Day. Not for nothing has Sutherland received seven Emmy nominations (with one statue) for his portrayal of Jack Bauer, leading the way for the pack of what are said to be iconic anti-heroes in this decidedly anti-heroic age.

Jon Hamm, who plays Mad Men's Don Draper, matched Sutherland with his own seventh Emmy nomination. (But he'll have to wait till next year for his first, and long deserved, statue.) Bryan Cranston, Breaking Bad's Walter White, has six (with four statues). James Gandolfini earned six Emmy nominations, and three wins, as Tony Soprano in The Sopranos. (He proved to be the acting nemesis of West Wing star Martin Sheen, whose six Emmy nominations for playing straight-up heroic President Josiah Bartlett yielded no statues.) Coming up fast in the iconic anti-hero sweepstakes is Kevin Spacey, with two nominations in two years for his Frank Underwood on House of Cards. He's president now, too, as perhaps the ultimate anti-Bartlett.

Whether all these figures are anti-heroes, or in some cases something else entirely, is an interesting question, as you'll see. As is the question of why anti-heroes are so important in quality television.

Short form answer is that they match the times. It's a mostly cynical and sour era, with little faith in institutions or, generally speaking, leaders. Seen a lot of hope and spare change lately?

And anti-heroes are very interesting, with the potential for many intriguing twists. That makes them easier to write than a good guy. While anti-heroes are dominating television, superheroes are dominating movies. But a series about Captain America, aka Steve Rogers, the self-sacrificing "little guy" with great '40s values who became the first super-soldier, wouldn't be easy to do. All that goodness, so boring. And who would buy it, week in and week out, in this snarky culture which looks to validate its shallowness?

While the literary Sherlock Holmes, and his multiple cinematic incarnations, has long been part of our cultural canon, the modern day version for the BBC, masterminded by Doctor Who showrunner Steven Moffat and running in the US on PBS, is much less well known to American audiences than these iconic characters of American television. That's too bad. In Benedict Cumberbatch's more than capable hands, Holmes is a strikingly anti-social genius ranging about a strikingly shot London in his various inquisitive quests.

Cumberbatch is best known to American audiences for playing the villain in last year's big hit, Star Trek Into Darkness. With a powerful voice, ferocious intellect, and arresting presence, he was doing very well until the script witlessly revealed his turncoat Starfleet officer-turned-terrorist to be Khan Noonien Singh, the genetically engineered superman from the past played so memorably by Ricardo Montalban in the original Star Trek series and in the greatest of all Star Trek films, The Wrath of Khan. Once it became apparent that STID, second in J.J. Abrams's rebooted film series, was actually a dumb reworking of Wrath of Khan, the performance of the aristocratic Londoner Cumberbatch, who looks nothing like a South Asian warlord, was lost in the conceptual wreckage.

But in Sherlock, he is in far better hands. As the "high-functioning sociopath" -- this Holmes's self-description, in counterpoint to suggestions that he is a psychopath -- Cumberbatch is all icily ruthless intellect, possessed of an arresting and frequently hilarious rudeness leavened by a menacingly silken charm. Riotously self-absorbed, albeit with a cold sense of unshakeable ethics, Sherlock is rescued from terminal sociopathy only by friendship with this era's Dr. Watson, the Afghan War-traumatized blogger played by fellow Emmy winner Martin Freeman (perhaps better known as The Hobbit) and a complex relationship with brother Mycroft Holmes, a shadowy MI6/Foreign Office maven played by Sherlock co-creator and Doctor Who writer Mark Gatiss.

As vivid as Robert Downey, Jr.'s Sherlock Holmes -- RDJ's other big film franchise -- is, this take is superior. (The less said about CBS's nonetheless watchable Sherlock Holmes series -- in classic me-too fashion it's set in the present day, too, but in New York City, which is ridiculous -- the better.) And we get more of Cumberbatch's Sherlock than RDJ's. The BBC produces three 90-minute TV movies every 18 months or so.

Like Sherlock, Breaking Bad's protagonist Walter White is a murderer, brilliant, selfish, endlessly dismissive of most others, etc. The difference, aside from Sherlock's murder being of a very bad guy, is that Sherlock is presented as a flamboyant asshole. Walter White, in contrast, is presented to the audience from the series' outset as a sympathetic figure.

A brilliant scientist somehow reduced to teaching apathetic high schoolers in Albuquerque, New Mexico, perhaps screwed out of a fortune after co-founding what became a multi-billion dollar company, a struggling family man with a son stricken by MS, who himself has learned that he has a terminal cancer.

That he turns to the meth trade by chance after his DEA agent brother-in-law takes him on a bust and he discovers (and covers for) one of his worst students ever making a clean getaway seems like a quirky form of justice, an evening of the scales in what is, after all, a corrupted society anyway.

It's the genius of Bryan Cranston's performance as Walt, and of the storytelling of Breaking Bad creator Vince Gilligan, who wrote many of the most offbeat and telling episodes of The X-Files, that much of the audience identified with Walter Whit'e plight for so long.

Because Walt is not only not a good guy making do in bad circumstances, he's not even really an anti-hero. He's the villain of the story.



"Oh, do your research. I'm not a hero, I'm a high-functioning sociopath. Merry Christmas!" Sherlock Holmes encounters an extremely powerful adversary who anticipates his moves.


There were big signs from the beginning.

How Walt constantly patronized and berated his loyal ex-student, Aaron Paul's wonderfully realized Jesse Pinkman (now winner of three Emmys for the role), who amusingly calls Walt "Mr. White" throughout. How Walt refused a big job with all health costs paid for from his now super-rich former business partners in favor of being a kingpin in the drug trade. How easily Walt rationalized making an even more powerful and addictive version of a drug, crystal meth, that even the biggest apologists for controlled substances can't rationalize away. How Walt, anxious to make a big deal, finding Jesse and his relapsed junkie girlfriend passed out, jostles the couple and then coldly watches as she drowns in her own subsequent vomit. How Walt, at a school assembly to address the tragedy, tries to minimize the import of the massive aerial disaster in the skies over Albuquerque caused by the murdered girl's distracted air traffic controller father.

By the time Jesse again tries to get them, their fortunes made, out of the drug trade with his plaintive question -- "Mr. White, are we in the meth business or the money business?" -- and Walt replies, "I'm in the empire business," it's clear where this has been going all along.

Walt's monstrous ego has been there all the time, disguised by manners and education, pathos and family. Perhaps it was his ego which got in the way of converting his early co-founder role at Gray Matter Technologies into legitimate riches.

Because it is Walt's egotism and anger and fear that leads him into some very bad calls in his guise as the dread "Heisenberg." After destroying his very good partnership with legitimate businessman Gustavo Fring, who was far better positioned than Walt to handle the overall business, he quite idiotically shoots Fring enforcer-turned-partner of Walt and Jesse Mike Ehrmantraut to death. Because Mike wouldn't facilitate the murder of his loyal team, whose knowledge Walt feared, AND because the brilliant Walt forgot that their transnational corporate associate Lydia already had all the information Walt had demanded from Mike.

But Mike, played by Jonathan Banks, Emmy-nominated here as he was on Wiseguy, the late '80s show which is something of an ur text for these shows, doesn't die right away.

First, he tells Walt how badly he has screwed everything up on account of his ego needs, blowing a highly professional set-up with Gustavo Fring, presaging Walt's future problems in inning up with a white supremacist biker gang. Then Walt realizes he didn't need to shoot Mike after all and apologizes to the mortally wounded ex-cop. But Mike, now sitting beside a beautiful little river, isn't interested in Walt's belated apology. "Walter, shut the fuck up and let me die in peace."

Walt never does really acknowledge that he's the bad guy. When he tells his wife Skyler, concerned for his safety, that he's not in danger, he is the danger, it's more chilling braggadocio than introspection.

It's Jesse Pinkman who calls himself "the bad guy." Yet it's Jesse, not Walt, who's the real anti-hero of the show. He has redeeming features, including a real heart not connected to a reflected narcissism, as Walt's concern for his family may be. He shows remorse for the incredible damage their product has caused, and real growth during the show, including notable acts of heroism.

Speaking of which, the show does have an actual hero, in the form of what at first seemed to be Walt's comedy relief brother-in-law. As DEA agent Hank Schrader, Dean Norris is equally adept at playing the buffoon and the hardass with heart. It's not really his fault that he finally tumbles to Walt's secret identity as Heisenberg just as Walt has set up another stupid murder, this time of Jesse, with a slew of white supremacist bikers who simply outnumber Walt and his partner.

Walt, as Hank points out, is the smartest guy he's ever known yet still too dumb to see that he can't let Hank live, though they do find a use for Jesse in cooking the fabled blue meth.

More problematic is the character of Walt's wife Skyler, played with double Emmy-adeptness by Anna Gunn. A lot of fans seem to have hated her, leading Gunn to pen a New York Times op-ed defending the complexity of her character, likening her to Betty Draper, the lightning rod ex-wife of Mad Men's Don Draper. The trouble with Skyler is that she's betwixt and between, neither the supportive moll to Walt's "Heisenberg" nor the the dismissive good citizen till late in the day.

Of course, Skyler White had a much bigger shock to deal with than Betty Draper ever had Betty's greatest shock -- as she wasn't shocked that Don Draper drank too much and cheated on her -- was that Don was really Dick Whitman, originally a poor, sad, nobody from nowhere. Skyler's discovery is that Walter White is actually a monstrous criminal.

Frankly, Walt makes Don Draper look like Captain America.

So does House of Cards' Frank Underwood. In Kevin Spacey's imaginative hands, Underwood -- an utterly ruthless, uber-witty aristocratic political schemer in the superior BBC original miniseries in the early '90s -- isn't really an anti-hero, either. He's a super-villain. He'd have to be to go, as the character none too convincingly does, from House majority whip to president without an election. Unlike the Brits (in whose system the House of Cards scenario actually made sense), we don't have a parliamentary system.

All of which makes the hatred many fans have for Mad Men's Don Draper more than a little strange. After all, Walter White, and Francis Underwood, for that matter, are much colder characters than the last flat-out criminal, James Gandolfin's Tony Soprano, who flat out transfixed viewers.

But I think Jon Hamm will finally get his due for his much subtler performance -- playing a subtler and more sophisticated character -- when Mad Men's run ends next year. However, at the rate he's going, Don Draper may have turned into something of a hero by then. He does seem to be in an increasingly redemptive place, notwithstanding the many fantasies of doom which have spun up around him.

It might even be a healthier sign for the culture. Because the anti-hero theme, wildly entertaining as it can be, ultimately ends in a rather nihilistic place.



William Bradley Archive

Recaps of Some of Your Favorite Returning Fall TV Shows. In Gifs.

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Aside from being a little bit closer to the good kind of Daylight Savings, the biggest silver lining to the downfall of summer is the knowledge that fall TV is finally on the horizon, bringing some trusty old friends back into our lives once again. But the summer has been long and hot and has left us a little foggy on what went down during spring finales oh-so-long ago. So, we boiled previous seasons of some of our favorite returning fall shows down into bullet points, and jazzed those bullet points up with the magic of gifs.

Viva La Fall Premieres!

Previously on Modern Family:

1. Mitch and Cam proposed to each other at the same time.

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2. Lilly started Big Girl School.

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3. Gloria got a Manny.

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4. Jane Krakowski showed up.

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5. And there was the big gay wedding.

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Previously on The Mindy Project:

1. James Franco was around for a while, smiling a lot. No further explanation needed.

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2. Mindy ended things with Casey, hooked up with Cliff, then ended things with Cliff after she and Danny awkwardly attempted to join the Mile High Club.

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3. Nurses Tamara and Morgan also decided to hook up, in what we like to call "Hilarious B-Line Plot Points."

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4. Danny shut down an art exhibit featuring nude photos of himself, hosted by his ex-wife Chloë Sevigny.
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5. In a move that almost eclipsed everything, Morgan debuted his new beagle puppy.

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Previously on Revenge:

1. Conrad almost died.

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2. Lydia returned from the dead.

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3. Emily almost died.

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4. But instead had the shortest amnesia storyline in TV history.

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5. Charlotte got kidnapped.

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6. Aiden died.

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7. Conrad actually died.

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8. Victoria died inside.

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9. And Emily finally got her revenge. For now.

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Previously on Glee:

1. Tina got Carrie-ed.

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2. Kurt started a cover band with Adam Lambert and Demi Lovato.

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3. Gwyneth and Sue inexplicably became best friends.

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3. Rachel made her Broadway debut...

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4. And just as quickly looked to Hollywood.

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5. Shirley MacLaine covered Janis Joplin.

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6. June Squibb adorably covered Madonna in a bathrobe and Raybans.

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7. And the Glee Club mourned the loss of a peer and friend.

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Previously on Parks & Recreation:

1. Everyone got pregnant.

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2. Ben acted how all of us would act if we got the chance to sit on the Iron Throne.

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3. Andy was big in the children's entertainment world.

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4. Leslie met Mrs. Obama and fired Jon Hamm in the same episode.

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5. And best of all, Li'l Sebastian was resurrected as a hologram.

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Previously on South Park:

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1. Matt and Trey revealed the secret lyrics to the Game of Thrones theme song, and pretty much all of those lyrics were just "Wiener, Wiener."

2. Cartman briefly brought peace to the Middle East by convincing Kyle to publicly state how much he loved Cartman's farts.

3. The Black Friday battle between Xbox and PS4. The Xbox won.

4. George Zimmerman was asked to kill another unarmed black teenager, because "He's the best" at it.

5. Yo Gabba Gabba's Foofa flashes her goods at the MTV VMAs in honor of Miley Cyrus.

How to Tap Into Your Inner Black Woman... According to Lifetime

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Apparently, I've been going about life as a Black woman all wrong. Here I was thinking my melanin and my 4a 'fro were the only Black cards I needed, when in actuality, Black womanhood is about so much more... well, according to the people at Lifetime, that is.

Last week, the network debuted it's latest side-eye show, Girlfriend Intervention, aimed at its growingly diverse audience. Armed with sass, Indian Remi and neck rolls for days, the show chronicles fixer-upper white women who, with the help of their very own noble band of lip-smacking Black women captioned as lifestyle and beauty coaches, attempt to unleash their inner Sasha Fierce. Think "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy," but much more offensive.

With the SMH tagline of the season, "Trapped inside of every white girl is a strong Black woman ready to bust out," the show could be laughable if it wasn't wrong at nearly every level.

Toss aside the fact that the show reduces the "strong Black woman" to nothing more than a big booty and a hand to the hip and sweater-clad white women everywhere as "basic," and we've still got 99 problems. No. 51 being that former "Bad Girl" Tanisha Thomas, who earned a place in reality show hall of fame by busting freestyles to a cookie sheet and saucer pan beat, has apparently rebranded herself as therapist of sorts, or what the show has dubbed a "soul coach" (because part of being a Black woman is remixing existing terms to give them more "soul," because Merriam-Webster's version just didn't have enough swag.).

But cackles and sista girl high fives aside, there were a few teachable moments for me in the midst of the 60-minute foolery. So, in the event there's a 26 ''waist, 45'' hip Black woman just dying to break free inside of you, here are a few tips guaranteed to have Lifetime knocking on your door and sending you down the "catwalk of shame" in no time.

Cast your body image issues to the wind.
The bigger the booty, the more confident the Black woman. Who has time for a body pity party when you're strutting through life bouncing nickels off 'dat a**? "As Black women, we definitely embrace our size for what it is," says style guru and one-fourth of the Sisterhood, Tiffany Dixon. Oh, but those "basic" white women? Well, after love, marriage and the baby carriage, it's all downhill. As Thomas puts it, "with Caucasian women, you get married, you marry the man of your dreams, you have his children, and now it's time to stop taking care of you? Girl, I missed that memo." Remember ladies, as a Black woman, your booty is your best accessory. And with all that bounce to the ounce on your backside, there's no time to be self-conscious.

Tell it like it is.
No bottling of the emotions here. As a Black woman, it's your right, and doggonit your duty, to speak to truth to mopey white women.

Rapping is preferred -- in fact, it's strongly encouraged.
A Black woman never leaves home without an eight-bar. Soul sistas tend to live their lives to a soundtrack (preferably a Beyoncé one), so it's only natural most are born with an innate ability to bust a flow at any given moment. Whether you're a white girl from Orange County or a socialite on the Upper East Side, spitting dope lyrics is a prerequisite to join the Chocolate Club. So, grab a mic, tell the DJ to drop the beat and get your Yoncé on.

Don't ever (and I mean EVER) befriend a white mannequin.
Need I say more?

Look your best at all times.
Because no Black woman would be caught dead or alive in a knit scarf and Ugg boots. Life may be falling apart, but your makeup, hair and nails must remain intact at all times. Besides, no Black man wants a BW (basic woman) by his side, so get it together, girls.

Always keep a quartet of sassy Black women readily available.
So what's the secret to success as a Black woman, you ask? Well, your sistas, of course! Due to the size of their derrières, they will most likely not fit in your back pocket, so you'll have to find alternative storage methods. A word of caution: Only use these girls in times of distress, styling tips or when in need of serious laughter, as most don't function well in intellectual conversations.

Bands may not make you dance, but darn it, some type of beat better make you bust a move.
Again, Black women and other women of color have rhythm and therefore, so must you. Surprisingly, the dance of choice is not always the twerk. Other ethnic dances like the Wobble or Salsa are also approved.

So, there you have it, ladies. Everything you need to know about traveling the road to Black womanhood sans blackface. Now toot your booty, find a posse, pray to the hip-hop gods and make us proud.

Joan Rivers Remembered

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When I was able to sit down with Joan Rivers for my nightly program just two months ago, it was the fulfillment of a 10-year quest to have her on the show. When I first moved to Los Angeles 27 years ago to make my mark, Joan was the very first comic that I ever saw do stand-up. She was performing at Carlos and Charlie's. I was working for Tom Bradley, the late, great mayor of this city and because of the mayor I met the owners of that iconic club. I used to go up to the lounge there to watch, learn, and laugh. So getting the opportunity to talk to her -- represented a full-circle moment for me. Over two nights, our conversation covered many things -- her devotion to her family, her legendary work ethic, her delight in making people laugh -- and then it took on what turned out to be a prescient dimension. I asked her how she would know when the time had come to stop performing. Here's her answer:




*TRANSCRIPT*



Rivers: I will know when I guess I do the same joke three times, I will know. And then I will go offstage and call Dr. Kevorkian. And you're waiting for a joke. There's no joke.

Tavis: No, no, I didn't laugh. I was just about to say I think you meant that.

Rivers: Oh, true.

Tavis: That if you couldn't be onstage, you wouldn't want to be here.

Rivers: Done. I have it in my will or whatever you call it, and the lawyer got crazy. Do not resuscitate if I cannot get up and be able to do 90 minutes onstage in concert. That's it. And my lawyer argued with me about how long [laugh].

Tavis: You wanted 90 minutes.

Rivers: He said, "What about 60?" I said, "90 minutes, Michael."

Tavis: If I can't do 90, don't even resuscitate me.

Rivers: Do not resuscitate. 90 minutes onstage. He's arguing "How about 60? We'll get a really good opening act." [Laugh] He's arguing. My life is crazy.

Tavis: I didn't laugh when you said that because I...

Rivers: Absolutely true.

Tavis: I saw in your eyes that you meant that.

Rivers: Oh, totally.

Tavis: If I can't do what I do, I don't even want to be around here.

Rivers: Don't want to sit down and be a vegetable. I don't want Melissa seeing her mother sitting there singing World War I songs, "Over there, over there..." [Laugh] "Change her catheter." I don't want any of this, uh-uh, mm-mm. Hello, Amsterdam, I'm outta here [laugh].

I've had a great life. If I drop dead right now, nobody's gonna say, "So young." [Laugh]. I've had such a great ride, such a great ride. I'm just so lucky, so lucky.

Joan Rivers' Animal Evolution

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Joan Rivers with PETA's Dan Mathews


Joan Rivers had a barbed tongue but she also had a soft spot for animals. She went everywhere with her dog, Spike, whom she credited with saving her from committing suicide after her husband's death.

Despite her penchant for wearing fur, Joan always appreciated PETA's efforts. She invited me to come onto her talk show for a lively debate on the topic in 1989. In the '90s, Joan enthusiastically helped launch her daughter Melissa's "Rather Go Naked Than Wear Fur" ad for PETA. Soon after, for Passover, Joan recorded PETA's vegan hotline promoting soy ham, or as Joan called it, "pork even a Jew can eat."

In 2010 Joan helped PETA lobby the New York City Council to pass a bill against chaining dogs and promoting spaying and neutering. "I hope this bill passes not just for the sake of the poor dogs tied up outside in the cold, but for the sake of the sons of b*****s who do this -- because what I'd do to the creeps would be far worse than what any police officer would do!" she wrote. Both bills passed.

Joan even had compassion for ants. Reading Edward O. Wilson's novel Anthill gave her a new respect for these industrious little insects. "Those poor ants work 24/7," Joan told People magazine. "Now, I don't throw my sandwiches away: I put them on the streets. Let the ants have a little break...A woman said, 'You're littering," and I said, 'I'm feeding the ants!'"

Last month, only a few weeks before she went into the hospital, I met with Joan one last time. She told me she hadn't bought any new furs since Melissa's PETA campaign and intended to bequeath her furs to PETA to give to the homeless. We'll all miss Joan terribly, but her legacy will live on in many meaningful ways.
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